This is hilarious. A wife posted all the weird shit her husband says in his sleep online.
Favorite ones so far:
“Hey! This is MY playground. These are MY swings. That’s MY climbing pyramid. And that’s MY springy elephant! THAT’S MY SPRINGY ELEPHANT! You crusty knob-end. Bog off! Leave this playground to the king of playtime! … Mmmm, they’re all mine…. I need a push. (whining pathetically) I can’t swing without a push. PUSH ME! Where is everyone? Bastards. (muttering bitterly) This is MY playground.”
“Pith helmet, check. Baby wipes, check. Small box, check. Let’s go midget smuggling! YAY!”
